13 years ago today as I walked up a foster carers path I could already hear my new son shouting 'new mummy here' and as the door opened he landed in my arms.
I've always been really positive about adoption as it gave that little boy the mummy he so desperately wanted and needed and gave me the chance to be a mummy.
Little did I know then how the next 13 years would pan out. It was never easy but the last 2 years have been harder than I ever could have imagined. This is because of a mixture of childhood trauma, a lack of post adoption support and little or no understanding from professionals of the impact of trauma and adverse life experiences on children and adults.
Yet again we've had another appointment where I've ended up in tears at the lack of support and understanding as ' hes making choices' or ' hes an adult and has capacity' which I can clearly see isn't the full picture of what's going on with my son.
That little boy is now 19 and although his early life experiences make it difficult to support him at times I hope he knows that I will always be here in his corner and i will never give up on him. That's what I texted him this morning.